Fic: The Maiden Voyage of The S.S. Bad Touch

The plan has seven steps, and Sam writes them all down on a diner napkin while he, Dean, and Cas have lunch.

#1 - Castiel kills all the demons
#2 - Castiel steals map from demons
#3 - Castiel follows map, finds whatever it is that the magic thingy is
#4 - Castiel gets thingy, brings it back to HQ
#5 - Sam and Dean eat pancakes, watch movies, and wait for Cas to finish with steps 1-4
#6 - Figure out what the thingy is and does
#7 - Profit (by stopping the apocalypse)

Castiel isn't thrilled, but Sam and Dean both agree it's a pretty decent plan and that's two against one.

"The beauty is in the simplicity," Dean says, slurping his coffee noisily.

( Castiel and Sam share an annoyed look. )