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sunspotTitle: Existential Crisis, Thy Name Is 'Pork Chop'
Fandom: Supernatural
Rating: 13+
Word Count: ~450
Summary: Pre-series. Sam contemplates the transient nature of life in 11th grade biology.
Author's Notes/Disclaimer: Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
wordsmeetwings. Characters and series creative property of Eric Kripke, The CW and it's affiliates.
Grade eleven biology was fascinating.
Mostly, it was because Jenny Luscott was his lab partner and she almost never wore a bra under her white school uniform top. Yeah, Sam remembers, biology was awesome.
Towards the end of the semester, they spent a whole week dissecting a pig. Jenny was completely grossed out and acting like a total girl about it, so Sam was in charge of the scalpel while she took the notes.
Sam made the first cut, neat and straight, just like Dad and Dean had taught him. He pulled out organs and entrails while Jenny sketched pictures. Sam weighed the organs and Jenny took notes. They dismantled the dead pig, piece by piece and catalogued everything.
The strangest part of it all was how easily it all worked. All the pieces came apart under his fingers and left a perfect hole. When he looked at it, Sam could see where everything fit together neatly to form a working whole. He held the little heart in his hands and just marvelled at the intricacies of creation. It came apart without a thought, and fit together just as simply.
At the end of the week, the teacher called for everyone to put their pigs into bags and turn them in for proper disposal. Sam started fitting the organs and the pieces back together inside the body, but the teacher stopped him.
“Don’t worry about, Sam, it’s just going to be incinerated,” she had said.
Sam was stunned. He’d spent all week taking the pig apart so carefully, and now he was expected to just toss it out without another thought? It was unfathomable.
Sam found himself unreasonably angry and unbearably sad at the same time. The little empty pig had never lived, never seen the sun or felt the air or had a brother... And its second to last experience on earth was going to be getting jammed in a bag with its liver next to its kidneys next to its face. It wasn’t a concept Sam could stomach. He felt as empty as the pig. He felt like it was his life, his body, that had been separated and sifted through, as if it was his own self that he couldn’t fit back together.
Later that night, when Dean asked about school in an attempt to distract from their father’s noticeable absence, Sam told him about Jenny Luscott’s tits and the fight in the cafeteria in fourth period. He didn’t think he can talk about the pig without getting emotional and he wasn’t sure Dean would understand why he was so upset he couldn’t fit the pieces back together.
He went to bed that night, hoping that the feeling would disappear by morning.
Fandom: Supernatural
Rating: 13+
Word Count: ~450
Summary: Pre-series. Sam contemplates the transient nature of life in 11th grade biology.
Author's Notes/Disclaimer: Written for
wordsmeetwings. Characters and series creative property of Eric Kripke, The CW and it's affiliates.Grade eleven biology was fascinating.
Mostly, it was because Jenny Luscott was his lab partner and she almost never wore a bra under her white school uniform top. Yeah, Sam remembers, biology was awesome.
Towards the end of the semester, they spent a whole week dissecting a pig. Jenny was completely grossed out and acting like a total girl about it, so Sam was in charge of the scalpel while she took the notes.
Sam made the first cut, neat and straight, just like Dad and Dean had taught him. He pulled out organs and entrails while Jenny sketched pictures. Sam weighed the organs and Jenny took notes. They dismantled the dead pig, piece by piece and catalogued everything.
The strangest part of it all was how easily it all worked. All the pieces came apart under his fingers and left a perfect hole. When he looked at it, Sam could see where everything fit together neatly to form a working whole. He held the little heart in his hands and just marvelled at the intricacies of creation. It came apart without a thought, and fit together just as simply.
At the end of the week, the teacher called for everyone to put their pigs into bags and turn them in for proper disposal. Sam started fitting the organs and the pieces back together inside the body, but the teacher stopped him.
“Don’t worry about, Sam, it’s just going to be incinerated,” she had said.
Sam was stunned. He’d spent all week taking the pig apart so carefully, and now he was expected to just toss it out without another thought? It was unfathomable.
Sam found himself unreasonably angry and unbearably sad at the same time. The little empty pig had never lived, never seen the sun or felt the air or had a brother... And its second to last experience on earth was going to be getting jammed in a bag with its liver next to its kidneys next to its face. It wasn’t a concept Sam could stomach. He felt as empty as the pig. He felt like it was his life, his body, that had been separated and sifted through, as if it was his own self that he couldn’t fit back together.
Later that night, when Dean asked about school in an attempt to distract from their father’s noticeable absence, Sam told him about Jenny Luscott’s tits and the fight in the cafeteria in fourth period. He didn’t think he can talk about the pig without getting emotional and he wasn’t sure Dean would understand why he was so upset he couldn’t fit the pieces back together.
He went to bed that night, hoping that the feeling would disappear by morning.
